Don't jump on a man unless he's down. - Finley Peter Dunne
Most vegetarians look so much like the food they eat that they can be classified as cannibals. - Finley Peter Dunne
The past always looks better than it was; it's only pleasant because it isn't here. - Finley Peter Dunne
The world is not growing worse and it is not growing better -- it is just turning around as usual. - Finley Peter Dunne
Stories are meant to comfort the afflicted, and afflict the comfortable. - Finley Peter Dunne
The Puritans gave thanks for being preserved from the Indians, and we give thanks for being preserved from the Puritans. - Finley Peter Dunne
An appeal is when you ask one court to show its contempt for another court. - Finley Peter Dunne